To Jennifer              Reply to this Comment

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Thanks for your your advice. I really am grateful to you because I don't know anyone who's going through the same as me, so I don't know what's "normal" and what's not-so, thanks so much for your advice. God bless x

To Jennifer              Reply to this Comment

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There is no such think as recovered crack head. Trust me I know. I have done my homework. You just never know what you are going to get 2,3,4,5 year later. I am sorry. i wasn't trying to be a MEANIE. Really. I would never get near a ch if my life depeneded on it. No matter how much I loved. Did it for 10 years- He a recreational user. I was naivie like you. I fhe tried 1x 2x years ago you might be in the clear. But someone that had a problem with it forget about. Straight up Ticking Time Bomb. If true. Your story is the first person who has recovered over thousands of stories I have read and known. Watch Out. If you blow my 2 cents into warn you. One day you will remember this reponse to your post.

How to deal with a crack addict.              Reply to this Comment

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Ashley, you mentioned in your posting that your boyfriend is everything that you could have ever prayed for. Prayer is the key. As you study your bible, you will find that there were many situations where children of God found themselves in uncomfortable situations, situations, that only God could bring them through. None of us know what God's will is in your situation. I know what you mean when you speak of his good character. Ashley God has shown me that there are things we are to learn from our trials. We are to learn to hold on to God's unchanging hand. He can give you peace as a single mother raising your children alone and he can give you peace as you wait for him to change your childrens father. Spend time in prayer and seek God's will. He may tell you to stay and he may tell you to flee. Whatever God tells you, you must be obedient to Him. In the mean time whether you stay or flee continue to lift up your childrens father (he is not a "boy" he is a man). Pray for him to seek a true relationship with God. Pray for yourself and your children that God will use this thing to magnify Him. Prayer works!

crack              Reply to this Comment

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My son is a crack addict. I have lived with the horrors of this addiction for way to long. He recently went to Michigan and same old thing. He calls, he crys, he says he has no place to go. He sounds so pathetic. Everytime you believe them, you get burned. He pleaded with my sister and I to get him a place to stay. I wired him the money, 270.00, and he never showed up at the motel. This whole day, I wish I was dead. Then I wired the money and felt a slight bit of hope. But very soon reality set in and I knew he had done it to me again. He will always find a way to get to me, know matter how hard I try to resist. I lost my home and my job in Michigan because of his addiction. Everything I worked for my whole life, gone. Now I will lose this one. I can't stay at my work, he will always call me. Where will I go? Will I be able to get a job? What will I do with my dogs? I am a mother and I am the worst kind of enabler. My son is 30 years old and it just goes on and on and on. I hate life and I get up everyday and go through the motions. I love my son but I hate what he does. I hate what he has become. He will never, ever, leave me alone. He will attempt to suck every last nickle from me. I will never understand. I try to, but I can't. I will have to give up my family too. Friday he called my phone 13 times, Saturday 16 times, and Sunday 8 times. I would not answer my phone. Then he called me at my work. Like I said, I die a thousand times. I can't function. I need to go someowhere out of the country. I can not tlak to him. I need to cease to exist. I need help. Where can I go?

ARE YOU INVOLVED WITH CRACK ADDICT?              Reply to this Comment

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THE ONLY ANSWER IS RUN and DON'T LOOK BACK. YOU WILL BE SPINNING YOUR HEADS, CHASING YOUR TAILS. As you are now if you don't leave.

The love of my life smokes crack. HELP!              Reply to this Comment

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Please help me. The love of my life is currently using after being clean for 8 years. He disappears and wont call me for days until he is coming down from his "high." Then I hear all the promises in the world such as, "I want to change" "I love you, I wont use again" -Im sure we've all heard it before. We were planning on being married, Nov of 2006. We are both a man and woman of faith who believe in Gods healing and deliverence. My prayer is that he will desire true change and go to the only one who can change him. He can't do this alone, he can't do this in his own strength and I believe that is what he is trying to do. He blames his past as to why he uses to this day, even though he knows better. Most of my family and friends request that I cut him off completely, but knowing aside of this addiction, what a wonderful person he really is, it makes it very difficult. How do you support someone knowing they are such a wonderful person, yet, their addiction is hurting you (me) so greatly?? Yet, how can I walk away? Please help and pray for us. His name is Rodney. Apart of me feels like if he can clean up and make major changes in his life, I will take him back. I would want to spend the rest of my life with him if it just wasn't for this drug. It is very devastating to me. Im in prayer, trusting God on his behalf and I just need to know what to do. If you are a recovering crack addict reading this and could offer me any advice on how to handle this as he currently uses, I would greatly appreciate it. Should I stay? Should I go? I know they say that they have to hit "rock bottom" and if that means losing your job, home, loved ones etc... then so be it although walking away would be the hardest thing I'd ever have to do. Truly, if you could spend just 5 mins with him, you would see what a wonderful and joyful person Rodney really is.. You would see that he has all the potentional in the world and this lifestyle is just a waste of life. Please help. Im open to any advice. You can email me at Bounz24@yahoo.com. God bless you. Thank you for your time, prayers and support through this challenging time in my life.

addiction              Reply to this Comment

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the only way to cope when a loved one is an addict, is to be open and discuss where this leaves you, a good site to try ww.powerofthetounge/A_Place_for_Me_support the people on this site listern and have all been or are on this journey

weed/ PLEASE READ              Reply to this Comment

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ok i noticed everyone in here is talking about crack but in my case info about tat doesnt realy help me. i am a 13 yr. old who is recovering from quiting pot and it is the hardest thin i have ever done in my life so if any one has any advise PLEASE HELP me i am soo young and have my whole life ahead of me and i don want something like pot to get in the way of the good things that i can do...but then agin it's just soo hard too stop.

Life must go on!              Reply to this Comment

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BRANDY to you I say brava, I will be praying for you to keep up the good work. I just worked up the courage to leave my husband of seven years next week. I love him to death and have tried everything to help him. But in doing that I hurt myself badly. I was a full time student working part time, depending on my husband to support us while I paid $500 a month for school. The plan was for me to finish school before he started. It was going as planned until he slipped after a year of being clean. Slowly I seen him destroy himself, and no I did not just sit back and watch. I was fighting tooth and nail, but slowly I seen myself being destroyed too. I worked less and less hours to be around so he wouldn't be tempted to smoke at home. Which didn't help because eventually he was going to other users homes. Then he didn't care, I would wake up to him not being in bed and finding him in the computer room smoking. It ended up to the point where he would smoke in front of me. I basically didn't sleep but 8 hours a week and I was 119lbs, which I haven't been for 3 years ( normally 125- 130), my size you can tell the difference 5 lbs make. I stopped going to school to prevent users and dealers from coming to my home. I only had 1 quarter left for my A.S. degree. My husband has been telling me he does not want me around because I'm mean for telling him what to do. Now I am finishing my degree and plan on getting my bachlors and trying to think about myself, because my husband is not thinking about me or us. I thank god everyday we didn't have kids like I wanted. I hope no one lets their life be ruined because they can't let go. Staying in an addicts life only prolongs the pain. Only the addict can help the addict. DANIELLE you are so young, I know you can kick the habit. I didn't even know about weed until I was 15. The first thing you want to do is NOT BE AROUND OTHER SMOKERS! I can not stress this enough. I was not a smoker until I was 16, my boyfriend smoked evry hour, but I didn't smoke until a year later, because I was around only him and his friend s who smoked. Oh yeah, this habit gets very expensive. First you get it free from friends and dealers who want you hooked. The older you get the harder it will be to get and afford. Soon you will just want to get the strong stuff (hydro). That's what happen to me and friends until I kicked it at 25yrs old. Try hobbies, being around people who don't smoke, sports, whatever you have interest in. You want to keep your mind busy. That's why I love school and church. ANGELA I heard all those things too, but it only confused me. I knew I had to leave to keep my sanity and myself respect. Leaving does not have to be perminent,but yu need to think about your future and goals and make them happen. Once that is taken care of and you feel stronger within yourself maybe you can help him or even realize life isn't so bad without him. Just keep praying and listen to what the lord tells you, it's not always what you want to hear. I will be praying for your strength. My husband use to break every cigarette I took out, he did not even drink, now he would rather the company of the drug than even his mom, who now financially supports him. MOMS cut loose your kids. I know it's the hardest thing to do, but tough love is what is needed with addicts. If they always have plan B for finacial support, why not spend thousands of $$$ and not pay bills. They know who they can take advantage of, and doing that drug will only allow them to take advantage of everyone in their life even their dealers. Stay strong this drug is very detrimental to every relationship. COOPER I am with you 500%! CHRIS Danielle is sooooo right, that's pretty much how you have to live 1 day at a time. It's a battle every time you wake up or there are tons of triggers. My husband would smoke giving the reason that he had seen his dad that day( his dad is a crack addict of 25 years. Hang in there, I'm glad you want help, counseling helps a lot too. Be around positive non smokers. PEEWEE I say get out before it gets worst, only the addict can make the addiction go away! GOD BLESS YOU ALL!

Life must go on!              Reply to this Comment

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BRANDY to you I say brava, I will be praying for you to keep up the good work. I just worked up the courage to leave my husband of seven years next week. I love him to death and have tried everything to help him. But in doing that I hurt myself badly. I was a full time student working part time, depending on my husband to support us while I paid $500 a month for school. The plan was for me to finish school before he started. It was going as planned until he slipped after a year of being clean. Slowly I seen him destroy himself, and no I did not just sit back and watch. I was fighting tooth and nail, but slowly I seen myself being destroyed too. I worked less and less hours to be around so he wouldn't be tempted to smoke at home. Which didn't help because eventually he was going to other users homes. Then he didn't care, I would wake up to him not being in bed and finding him in the computer room smoking. It ended up to the point where he would smoke in front of me. I basically didn't sleep but 8 hours a week and I was 119lbs, which I haven't been for 3 years ( normally 125- 130), my size you can tell the difference 5 lbs make. I stopped going to school to prevent users and dealers from coming to my home. I only had 1 quarter left for my A.S. degree. My husband has been telling me he does not want me around because I'm mean for telling him what to do. Now I am finishing my degree and plan on getting my bachlors and trying to think about myself, because my husband is not thinking about me or us. I thank god everyday we didn't have kids like I wanted. I hope no one lets their life be ruined because they can't let go. Staying in an addicts life only prolongs the pain. Only the addict can help the addict. DANIELLE you are so young, I know you can kick the habit. I didn't even know about weed until I was 15. The first thing you want to do is NOT BE AROUND OTHER SMOKERS! I can not stress this enough. I was not a smoker until I was 16, my boyfriend smoked evry hour, but I didn't smoke until a year later, because I was around only him and his friend s who smoked. Oh yeah, this habit gets very expensive. First you get it free from friends and dealers who want you hooked. The older you get the harder it will be to get and afford. Soon you will just want to get the strong stuff (hydro). That's what happen to me and friends until I kicked it at 25yrs old. Try hobbies, being around people who don't smoke, sports, whatever you have interest in. You want to keep your mind busy. That's why I love school and church. ANGELA I heard all those things too, but it only confused me. I knew I had to leave to keep my sanity and myself respect. Leaving does not have to be perminent,but yu need to think about your future and goals and make them happen. Once that is taken care of and you feel stronger within yourself maybe you can help him or even realize life isn't so bad without him. Just keep praying and listen to what the lord tells you, it's not always what you want to hear. I will be praying for your strength. My husband use to break every cigarette I took out, he did not even drink, now he would rather the company of the drug than even his mom, who now financially supports him. MOMS cut loose your kids. I know it's the hardest thing to do, but tough love is what is needed with addicts. If they always have plan B for finacial support, why not spend thousands of $$$ and not pay bills. They know who they can take advantage of, and doing that drug will only allow them to take advantage of everyone in their life even their dealers. Stay strong this drug is very detrimental to every relationship. COOPER I am with you 500%! CHRIS Danielle is sooooo right, that's pretty much how you have to live 1 day at a time. It's a battle every time you wake up or there are tons of triggers. My husband would smoke giving the reason that he had seen his dad that day( his dad is a crack addict of 25 years. Hang in there, I'm glad you want help, counseling helps a lot too. Be around positive non smokers. PEEWEE I say get out before it gets worst, only the addict can make the addiction go away! GOD BLESS YOU ALL!

Life must go on!              Reply to this Comment

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BRANDY to you I say brava, I will be praying for you to keep up the good work. I just worked up the courage to leave my husband of seven years next week. I love him to death and have tried everything to help him. But in doing that I hurt myself badly. I was a full time student working part time, depending on my husband to support us while I paid $500 a month for school. The plan was for me to finish school before he started. It was going as planned until he slipped after a year of being clean. Slowly I seen him destroy himself, and no I did not just sit back and watch. I was fighting tooth and nail, but slowly I seen myself being destroyed too. I worked less and less hours to be around so he wouldn't be tempted to smoke at home. Which didn't help because eventually he was going to other users homes. Then he didn't care, I would wake up to him not being in bed and finding him in the computer room smoking. It ended up to the point where he would smoke in front of me. I basically didn't sleep but 8 hours a week and I was 119lbs, which I haven't been for 3 years ( normally 125- 130), my size you can tell the difference 5 lbs make. I stopped going to school to prevent users and dealers from coming to my home. I only had 1 quarter left for my A.S. degree. My husband has been telling me he does not want me around because I'm mean for telling him what to do. Now I am finishing my degree and plan on getting my bachlors and trying to think about myself, because my husband is not thinking about me or us. I thank god everyday we didn't have kids like I wanted. I hope no one lets their life be ruined because they can't let go. Staying in an addicts life only prolongs the pain. Only the addict can help the addict. DANIELLE you are so young, I know you can kick the habit. I didn't even know about weed until I was 15. The first thing you want to do is NOT BE AROUND OTHER SMOKERS! I can not stress this enough. I was not a smoker until I was 16, my boyfriend smoked evry hour, but I didn't smoke until a year later, because I was around only him and his friend s who smoked. Oh yeah, this habit gets very expensive. First you get it free from friends and dealers who want you hooked. The older you get the harder it will be to get and afford. Soon you will just want to get the strong stuff (hydro). That's what happen to me and friends until I kicked it at 25yrs old. Try hobbies, being around people who don't smoke, sports, whatever you have interest in. You want to keep your mind busy. That's why I love school and church. ANGELA I heard all those things too, but it only confused me. I knew I had to leave to keep my sanity and myself respect. Leaving does not have to be perminent,but yu need to think about your future and goals and make them happen. Once that is taken care of and you feel stronger within yourself maybe you can help him or even realize life isn't so bad without him. Just keep praying and listen to what the lord tells you, it's not always what you want to hear. I will be praying for your strength. My husband use to break every cigarette I took out, he did not even drink, now he would rather the company of the drug than even his mom, who now financially supports him. MOMS cut loose your kids. I know it's the hardest thing to do, but tough love is what is needed with addicts. If they always have plan B for finacial support, why not spend thousands of $$$ and not pay bills. They know who they can take advantage of, and doing that drug will only allow them to take advantage of everyone in their life even their dealers. Stay strong this drug is very detrimental to every relationship. COOPER I am with you 500%! CHRIS Danielle is sooooo right, that's pretty much how you have to live 1 day at a time. It's a battle every time you wake up or there are tons of triggers. My husband would smoke giving the reason that he had seen his dad that day( his dad is a crack addict of 25 years. Hang in there, I'm glad you want help, counseling helps a lot too. Be around positive non smokers. PEEWEE I say get out before it gets worst, only the addict can make the addiction go away! GOD BLESS YOU ALL!

OOPS!              Reply to this Comment

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CHRIS when I said danille I meant brandy.

OOPS!              Reply to this Comment

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CHRIS when I said danille I meant brandy.

Life does go on              Reply to this Comment

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Keysha Keep your head up! You seem to be doing the right thing and in the right direction.Much love on your input.I will Keep all of you in my prayers.Take care, and be true to yourself.

drinking              Reply to this Comment

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I dont see why people stop drinking besides the money problem cause i love drinkin!!!

Crack              Reply to this Comment

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Can someone please give me some advice. my partner is a crack head and smokes it all day. it started about 8 months ago when he kept it a secret for several months and was binging all the time. it eventually came out when he was being aggresive all the time and i couldn't understand why. i have tried to talk to him about it since but he seems to think that by slowly cutting it down he will eventually be able to quit for good, but i am not so sure. it seems to me that now he has come clean about his addiction that he doesn't need to do anymore and it has been accepted but it hasn't, and i am seriously worried about our future. he doesn't have any motivation to do anything and not only is he a slave to his habit but now i am. i feel i need some help as it is destroying our lives, he won't get help or listen to anything and to be honest i don't know enough about the drug, never having touched them in my life, to be in a position to suggest anything. i have lost alot of respect for him and when i see him rolling his next fix i find myself seething with rage and i want to smack him with something to make him open his eyes and see what he is doing to our family. Has anyone got any advice???

lIVING WITH A DRUG ADDICT              Reply to this Comment

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WELL I CAME TO CALI FOR A BETTER LIFE WITH MY BOYFRIEND OF 9YRS AND OUR CHILDREN. PROBLEM IS HIS FATHER CAME ALONG AND HES A DRUG ADDICT. HE COMES IN HIGH AND ACTS DUMB AND I HATE THIS BECAUSE I HAVE A SIX YEAR OLD AND A TWO YEAR OLD. I CANT EXPRESS MYSELF ENOUGH TO MY BOYFRIEND THAT ITS A DANGEROUS SITUATION FOR OUR CHILDREN ESPECIALLY HAVING A LITTLE GIRL. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO IM IN A BAD FINANCIAL SITUATIION WHERE I JUST CANR GET UP AND LEAVE. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO ANYMORE. ITS STRESSING AND IM SCARED.

To Asheley              Reply to this Comment

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I feel so badly for the situation that you are in and I know you dont want people to comment on your children, but hear me out for one second. I know that you said your children are small. but dont think for a moment that they dont know that there is something different about thier father. I know, because my mother is a crack addict. My grandmother raised me since I was a baby and she along with everyone else in my family didnt think I knew what was going on. My mother was the best mother....when she was around! But I couldnt understand why she would leave and be gone for so long. I missed her. I couldnt understand why I couldnt live with my mommy like all the other kids. I started to pay attention. When I was 4, I realized that my mommy had a problem and I started asking questions. I am now 24 years old with 2 kids of my own and my mother still does the same things. I met my father when I was 18 and I will tell you that it is easier to deal with when the parent is completely out of your life then one that is so great when they are there but you are missing them every moment that they are gone wondering why they are choosing this substance over you and what you have done wrong! I know you love this man as I love my mother, but my children love my mother too and I refuse to let them go through what I went through as a child b/c of a drug! The addict will never get clean until the addict is ready. And I do think, as you, that they have the ability to love, but not in the capacity that we do b/c they cant love themselves enough to stop destroying themselves. In my opinion, the best thing you can do is remove yourself and your children from this situation. Being exposed to his "in and out" lifestyle is enough to produce emotional issues within your children. To this day, I have issues with being alone and people leaving me b/c my mother used to leave me all the time and not come back for days or months, even with my grandmother there taking care of me. But now that my grandma has passed, I still deal with those issues and I have never done crack or anything to that effect, hell, I dont even drink! Please dont think that this isnt affecting your children, even at thier tender ages. I would do anything to save anyone from growing up with the pain of missing someone that doesnt have the power to stop hurting themselves (which is what was hurting me). I hope you dont take offense, but please consider how your children may be feeling! If you would like to talk further, please email me: phenomenatta@iwon.com

PnocSXPYqc              Reply to this Comment

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ashelee              Reply to this Comment

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ash i know jus what you're going thru i am in the same boat it's been going on 19yrs and i jus wonder if he'll ever stop using because has taken a toll on me and now my 13 old daughter but he takes care of us finanically today is his birthday and he's gone do crack and it hurts so bad