family crisis              Reply to this Comment

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I've been on the internet for hours now, trying to find something or someone to help my sister and my family. It started about 4 or 5 months ago. My cousin who is 15, found out that she was pregnant. She says that she is a virgin and the only reason she didn't think it was strange that she was missing her period is because she plays soccer. It is true, that a missed period during a any sport season, isn't something to worry about. We come to find out later that my cousin had been at my sister's apartment drinking in Feb. My sister's boyfriend, who is 10 yrs older than her, was there with a friend. My cousin thinks that my sister's boyfriend raped her, because she has no memory of that night. She may have been drugged. Now she is due in less than a week and we will find out if she was raped by him or his friend soon enough. There's more of a problem to it than that. "Bill," my sister's boyfriend, has a criminal backround. He has had 5 or 6 charges brought against him for sexual assault with a minor. He never went to court for any of these charges, but all of these reports are still held as public record. My sister is going back and forth with the idea that he didn't do it, then she comes to and thinks, maybe he did. She's driving herself crazy and the rest of the family. She wants to be with him, but I believe she needs to get help. I just don't know where to look. She just found out about 10 months ago that she has Lupis too. I'm afraid she's going to bring herself to a panic attack or hurt herself if the baby is his. She used to have a mind of her own, now it seems like he's mindwarped her and she can't think for herself anymore. She's changed her phone number and blocked it so no one knows she's calling. And she also said she's going to "disown the whole family" and run away with "Bill" and start a new life. She's 19!!! I'm not much older, but she has her whole life ahead of her and doesn't need to be thinking about marriage and having kids. I'm just very very scared and I'm asking for help. I really would like to help her and so would my whole family. There's more to the situation than this, but his somes in up for the most part. Does anyone have any advice for me, my sister, or my family.

family crisis              Reply to this Comment

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wow, that is alot to think about. I know that your sister is in a scary situation. Being pregnant at such an early age is scary. I had my first child at 17. The difference is I remember exactly when I got pregnant and I married the father when I was 21. I'm 33 now and we have 5 children, including a set of twins. It's been really tough through the years, but we made it and we are more commited to each other than ever. The only advice I can give to you is to just support your sister. Even if this guy is a creep and he did take advantage of her, she seems to want to make a life with him. If I were in your situation I would want to keep my sister close to me so that when he does fail her, I can reel her back in. With some people, if you are against the one they love, they will leave you and there is no hope to reel them back in until they hit rock bottom. We don't want your sister to hit rock bottom at all...especially with a new baby. If this guy is no good, she will eventually see it. It is then that she will really need you and your family. Since she is about to have this baby, her life will change. Her priorities will change. That precious baby will be the center of her universe, and that is how it should be. There is plenty of time to work out the problems of this creep and get rid of him (and I feel that eventually she will do that herself).

..              Reply to this Comment

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that is a crazy story. but i know what ur cousin is goin through slightly. i just found out at 5 months i was pregnant and i am 18. her being 3 years younger then me shocks me as well. and the only reason i didn tthink iwas getting my period was because i played soccer and then my mom mentioned i looked pregnant and she bought me a pregnancy test. i was very very very much in denial and i was like no i didnt have sex with so and so. so she may just not want to admit it. but maybe not. the fact that she doesnt know who the father is is rough. and that she possibly got raped is even tougher. for ur sister i believe she can move on with "bill" she can get over him. she doesnt seem to want to tho. and she may be scared to death of what he might to do if they do break up. so you have to think of it like that. maybe one day suprise her with a relationship therapist. she will be in denial and evverything but some of the stuff the therapist says will hit her rock bottom.

rough time              Reply to this Comment

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my brother is 21 and he was just hospitalized for depression which was weird at first for us cuz he was always out with his friends and stuff and he rarely talks to us because thats the way he is. last night he came into my bed room and asked me what he should tell his friend girl who broke up with him when she left for school. she is very good to him and he and her talk abou everything she knows about the hospital visit and everything. i told him if he wants something with her he has to tell her how he feels since he can and i know she wil listen. i said and the worst she can do is deny you and she is not goin to be a bitch about it. i then informed her of what was coming n i said please dont be a bitch about it in case she was and he has not tlaked to her yet but i said to him he has to love himself before he loves someone else. and that is way true because then if you dotn the relationship is unhealthy. what am i goin to do if she denies him or says something rude to him. i want him to be able to talk to me like he did last night cuz i know he looks up to me cuz i am always in a relationship one way or another. he has never had a gf before but he really likes this girl. when she comes into town she always leads him on and stuff and later that night i texted her and she said i dont think i am ready yet and stuff liek that. im worried about him. he kinda made it seem like he was really depressed about her. cuz he said i have never gotten this depressed over something like this. what do i do? did isay the right thing? does anyone know a therapist in the chicagoland area that can help him like himself better and talk about this situation?

Mental Health Licensed Counselor              Reply to this Comment

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I have been looking for a specialized Mental Health Services for the Deaf that provide MHC for the deaf. I am currently in Florida working my way getting my license but I am orginally from the west coast and It would be nice to relocate back home. If any of you know the name of deaf mental health services, please get back to me at gallison65@gmail.com